1. We need to stop treating our husband like he is a child.

This might hit a nerve with some of you, but it happens all too often.  I’ve caught myself doing it before.  In an effort to bring out the “best” in our husbands, we start mothering them.  If we want to bring out the best in our husband, then we need to show him that we RESPECT him…even when he’s not quite worthy of it yet.

I know this seems a bit crazy, but almost every marriage book I have ever read emphasizes the husband’s great need for respect from his wife.  Let’s show him that we respect him and see what happens.  Just watch how he rises to the occasion.  As wives, we have special powers when it comes to this.  A husband needs and desires his wife…not another mother.  

  1.  We need to SAY what we mean and stop depending on our non-verbal communication.

Most women I know (myself included) struggle with this.  We tend to have good intuition, so we expect our husbands to as well.  The funny and frustrating thing about it is that 9 times out of 10, they just take us at our word.  They aren’t reading into our body language, sighs, or eye rolls.  This becomes a HUGE problem when we constantly depend on our non-verbals to do all the “talking”.

Non-verbals should only enhance our words, not take their place. For more on this, be sure to read “The Most Common Mistake Women Make in Marriage”.  As married women, we can’t shy away from talking through things…WITH WORDS…even if our husband seems happy to avoid talking.  Let’s approach our husbands with love and really share our hearts with them.  Intimacy begins with interaction.  

  1.  We need to stop placing our children before our husband.

I know this one can be a bit controversial especially when it comes to blended families, but please hear me out.  As parents, we are called to love and protect our children with every fiber of our being.  The primary way we can do this is by prioritizing our marriage.  The greatest gift we can offer our kids isn’t something money can buy; it is a healthy, happy, and loving marriage that they can look to as a good example.

My husband always says that we should have the kind of marriage that makes our kids WANT to get married someday.  This doesn’t mean we have to be perfect.  It just means that we both choose to love and commit ourselves to fostering a strong marriage.  This provides a kind of love and security for our children that will last a lifetime.

If you have a blended family and are navigating this issue, Kristie Carpenter, author of “The Blended Family Mom”, has some great insight and resources.

  1.  We must stop hanging out with friends who devalue or trash talk our husband. 

I’ve seen this one mistake lead to divorce right before my eyes.  We often become the very company we keep.  So, next time you are hanging out with your girlfriends, pay close attention to how they talk about your husband.  If it tends to be negative, than I would venture to say that she isn’t a very good friend.  In a previous post on the Facebook Marriage Page, I shared this quote,

When we hear our friends cutting down our spouse, we tend to see our spouse in that same negative light.  This must stop.  Marriage is hard enough without negative friends.  For more on this, be sure to check out “4 Things worth Fighting for in Your Marriage”.

If we want to build and maintain stronger marriages, then we have to foster friendships that respect our marriages and the institution of marriage as a whole.

  1.  We need to stop flirting with other men.

This one probably seems like a no-brainer to most of you, and yet it is a BIG problem in many marriages.  It may start innocently…you share laughs with a co-worker.  Then, you go to lunch…just the two of you.  Before you know it, the emails start coming.  Then, texts and phone calls.  And, then, that man is all you can think about.  You start hiding any communication with this person from your husband.  Before you know it, you find yourself in a sexual affair.

Friend, we must open our eyes to the truth. No flirting outside of our marriage is good.  There is NO such thing as “innocent flirting”.  It is the gateway drug to affairs, and it can ruin marriages.

As wives, we will certainly have conversations with other men at the office, church, or out-and-about, but we don’t have to flirt with these other men.  We should do our best to never be alone with another man that isn’t our husband or blood relative.  Nothing good can come from it.

Whenever we are talking to other men, we need to ask ourselves, “Would I feel comfortable with my husband having this same conversation (that I am having) with another woman?”.  If the answer is “No” then we are out of bounds, and we need to end the conversation immediately.  This may sound overzealous, but it just might save your marriage.

When we mess with fire, we will get burned.  I don’t want any of us to live with a lackluster marriage or feel the pain of an affair.  Let’s do all that we can to protect and strengthen our marriages.

Upcoming Events

Malawi Institute Of Journalism Got Talent Show (Lilongwe Campus)

Fri, 05 Apr 2019 @ Lilongwe Community Hall - Malawi Institute Of Journalism Lilongwe Campus Presents Mij Got Talent Show, Performances by Seven O More, ManzoOpenga, Zotto, Ray Skillz, Gilmo and Many More.... See you there !!!!

Red Cup Party

Fri, 05 Apr 2019 @ Blues - A FREE RED CUP TO EVERYONE UPON ENTRY! #RedCupParty #DJMAYA SEE YOU THERE !!!!!

Official Launch Of Castel Beer

Fri, 05 Apr 2019 @ SunBird Capital Hotel - Castel Malawi, Official Launch Of Castel Beer (Taste Of Success). Live Performance By Sauti Sol. Starting Time 20:00 till late. LETS MEET THERE ON 5TH APRIL,2019. More Fire Castel Malawi

Big Bang Social Saturday (Exploits University)

Sat, 06 Apr 2019 @ Blantyre Cultural Centre - Exploits University Presents Big Bang Social Saturday, Performances by Seven O More, Piksy, Martse, Cyen265, Bangerz, Dj Africa, Icon Mcee, Badman Nyau, Bangs, Killer Worms, Jills, Slic...

Blue Elephant Club Music Show

Sat, 06 Apr 2019 @ Blue Elephant - Blue Elephant Club Music Show Presents Saint And Stich Fray! SEEYOU THERE!!!!

Biggie Lu's Birthday Party

Sun, 07 Apr 2019 @ New Living Room - Biggie Lu's Birthday Party, Performances by Biggie Lu, Janta, Pentagon- Chishala from Zambia, Vube, Dj Wayne, Dj Muchei, Dj Laptop, Resident Djs. Date 7 April, 2019. The Party will Sta...

The Winter Splash Carnival

Fri, 26 Apr 2019 @ Blue Elephant - The Winter Splash Carnival, Achina Dj Ronnie and Dj Trick Kuzabutsa Moto Pa 26 April ku Blue Elephant. Ma Dj Okwiya Awa!!! Lets be There Fam.!!!!!

Unlimited Worship Concert

Sat, 27 Apr 2019 @ Hotel Victoria - Unlimited Worship Concert, I worship album Launch on 27th April, 2019. Shekinah supported by Faith Mussa and other worship Ministries : Allan Chirwa, PS. Ruth Mandha and Minister Ken & ...

L City Gang Launch

Sun, 28 Apr 2019 @ Midland Tower - L City Gang Launch, there will be Activities like Photoshoot, Singing, Dancing and Performances by Kisco, A Crucks, Amazon Gang, Zotto, Rappercenta, Dayo and Joe Santiago. SEE YOU THERE !!!!

Eya Zikiyenda Concert

Sat, 04 May 2019 @ 247 Entertainment Centre - 247 Entertainment Centre Presents " Eye Zikuyenda Concert" performances by malceba, Saint, Jants, Andy Music, Stich Fray, Jay Jay Cee, Black Nina, Heptic, Hilco, Smacks, Sir Patrics An...



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