I’m one of those weird people who had a love/hate relationship with school. While I was there, I dreaded ever going to class. This is probably a big reason why I missed all of the month of November because I slept in till dinnertime. But once I buckled down and got my degree, I found myself actually missing it.
Maybe it was just my immaturity showing, or maybe I just wasn’t ready for the responsibilities of real life, but I found myself right back in that classroom after taking a year away to actually earn some money.
That’s when I discovered I was definitely too old to be trying to recreate freshman year as a grown man. Live and learn.
Luckily, I’ve escaped for what is hopefully the final time. But I’ll always look back fondly at school as the place where I could really get away with anything, because one day people will actually pay you real money, and at that point you can’t just sleep your way through life. Lesson learned.
1. This is why they give out calendars that first week, but you never find the need to update it
2. Your sleeping habits definitely revolve around how many papers you have due
3. You become a living, breathing math problem
4. This is why Kanye thinks they need to drop the price of textbooks
5. Cooking level: broke college student
6. This is why students hoard cutlery like it will one day be a form of currency
7. You start to give the teacher exactly what they asked for
8. Vending machines provide the most basic form of nourishment
9. Coffee was basically for procrastinating students
10. When you can’t afford gas, but want to look classy in your student neighborhood
11. Must be a marketing major
12. Naturally, they’re missing the 5th stage: the no-show
13. My books were at least 13 pounds heavier after studying
14. Clearly there’s a theme. Eating is hard
15. I can actually feel the hand cramp
16. This dog is all of us
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