Some men secretly marry while they remain loyal to their wife, but in many cases something always  to let a cat out of bag, a spouse gets  a wind of whole situation, as this woman did at the her husband father’ burial.

The 36 -year old woman released one day at a burial ceremony that  her husband has married to another woman with four children , and she wrote to Marriage advisor  asked for advice.

“Dear marriage advisor,

My name is Chioma, a 36-year-old woman who has been married for 10 years with three children.

But as things have turned out, I am not sure I will be able to stay in my marriage after I found out that my husband, Ebuka, has another wife with four children.

And the most painful thing is that I found out only at his father’s burial two months ago and all his explanations have not convinced me in any way.

I never dreamt of being a second wife neither would I want to share my husband with another woman, so I feel the best thing for me to do is to pack out of Ebuka’s wife with my children so that his first wife can have peace because if we live together, there will be no peace in the house.

If Ebuka had told me he was married, there was no way I would have agreed to marry him in the first place and keeping such thing a secret from me for 10 years is the highest form of betrayal.

You can then imagine my shock when we all went home for my father-in-law’s burial and while we were cooking, I noticed there was this woman who shared my space with me and we sort of related well.

I also noticed how the family members and the village people kept greeting us and calling us co-wives. In my mind, I thought the woman was one of Ebuka’s brother’s wife and I did not give much thought to it.

But in the night leading to the burial date, there was a family meeting called and it was there that the family head explained that the woman I cooked with was actually my husband’s first wife and lived in one of his houses in the village.

The man said I should just accept the situation and continue to live as one family. I was thrown into a state of shock at the revelation and naturally, I stormed out of the meeting and went to my quarters.

Ebuka later came and explained to me that he and the woman had separated by the time we got married but that the family members had been on his neck to bring her back.

But since then, I have not been myself and I have vowed to take my children and leave him with his first wife.


Could you put yourself in Chioma’s shoe, what could you do?

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