If you think love hurts, try loneliness

Life is a rollercoaster. One time we want something and the next we do not and yet, once we let it go, we miss it. Love is expected to be a beautiful journey  but reality is a bumpy road where only the strong survive.

Those who are single are praying hard to get someone who loves them while those in relationships claim they sometimes feel suffocated. They want some alone time to engage in the same things their single friends do without any accountability.

My aunt will tell you that asking for a break in a relationship is giving the devil a chance to step in and mess it up. But psychologists say one should have some alone time to think about life and what they really want.

“I need some alone time,” she told her boyfriend John. “Time for what?” he asked. But Joan had no tangible explanation. Everything she said did not make sense to him; he was panicking. “Is she thinking of leaving me? Did she find someone else? Is she mad at me?” He could not stand the idea of her being alone since they had been dating for more than two years.

He blamed himself for not having proposed marriage yet. He knew this was the woman he wanted to be with but he was reluctant to cement the relationship.

“Give me two weeks, do not call or visit me. I will call you once I am ready,” she told him. He tried but after two days, he could not stop thinking about her. He called her and when she answered, she said, “we will count the two weeks afresh since you have violated my request.” She sounded determined, which drove him crazy.

Joan took a vacation to Zanzibar. She wanted to have time to herself, think about life and her priorities. John found out and it was more pressure than he had anticipated. He decided to swallow his pride and go after her. No matter what he did to occupy himself, his mind wandered back to Joan. The possibility that she could live without him hurt so much.

On her side, Joan had a reflection of how sad life can be if you are alone. Because if you are trying to run away from love, do not go to a romantic place. Zanzibar is an island that will likely make you fall in love all over again. So, being there did not help her situation, she started feeling lonely. There were couples everywhere and she missed having John around. She tried calling him but his phone was off. She was ready to end that two week’  madness and come back to John.

As she thought, someone knocked at the door. She thought the voice was familiar, and when she opened the door, there he was. Kneeling down and holding flowers, John said, “Forget what happened in the past, please marry me,” he said.

Although she woke and realised she was just dreaming, Joan wished John was there with her. She had never been away from him for even a week. She wanted to find out if she would miss him and yes, she did. Joan decided to cut her vacation short but as she was waiting for a taxi, John arrived.

Although she did not want to show any excitement, she was glad that he finally proposed marriage. The two lovebirds realised that they could not live without each other and the time spent apart had just confirmed this.