1. Men who have tiny p’εnisεs normally over compensate by attempting to own expensive things. For example, a man driving a Hummer probably has a really small “thing”.


2. Vehicles with a lift aka “Jack ed Up Trucks”: This category of men is probably suffering the most, actually. As I like to say, “the bigger the lift, the smaller the tool.” A man’s man-‘hood also grows smaller with every inch of camouflage that lines his interior and/or ignorant stickers that refer to the truck they are stuck on.
3. Unwarranted rage and/or jealousy: Is he jealous when it comes to other men? Or your friends? Or your family? Or your pet? Seriously, I have witnessed my friends’ boyfriends get mad at them about spending time with their family and friends when, apparently, they should have been fondl!ng his tiny “tool”.
4. Men who are obsessed with their appearance: Men who spend more time grooming themselves than you need to be tattooed with “small manhood.” Seriously, if a guy is trying really hard to amp up his game in the looks department, it usually means that you’ll be disappointed when you search for an ε’rεction but find a troll of a pεn!s.
5. Refusing to relate to anything feminine: Men who refuse to relate to anything feminine are probably doing so because their micro-manhood leaves them feeling like less of a man than it should. Being overly grossed out by periods, denouncing chick flicks, claiming that females cannot be funny, and refusing to do “womanly” activities are a few side effects of this symptom.
6. He’s dramatic: Men with small manhoods usually house lots of pent-up frustration (due to the fact that they have small “tools”), and get annoyed by any and everything. A man that has more drama than an episode of The OC can easily be diagnosed with small manhood syndrome.
7. Being a “player”: Some of the men who have the most s*x suffer from small manhood syndrome. These men try to spin the story in their favour and claim that they have so much s*x because they’re game is undeniable; however, most of the time when men only have consecutive one night stands, it’s because the your partner was left μnsatisfiεd by their teeny manhoods.
#8. Miscellaneous: There are some professions/miscellaneous things that require you to have a small “tool”. Here’s a brief list: owning a Mustang, being obsessed with your fraternity (TFM, BRO!), being mean to animals to assert your dominance, refusing to drink light beer or admit that anything but angus beef steak is your favourite food, thinking copious amounts of drugs and/or alcohol will magically grow your “thing”.
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