Think about your apology and really get to the bottom of the problem. Anyone can say they are sorry, but not everyone can mean it and back it up with a solution. Be aware that your girlfriend might expect you to think about your actions and/or words for a while before apologizing to her. Before you issue your apology, have solid answers about:[1]
- Why you did what you did, or said what you said, to upset her.
- What aspect of your personality that comes from.
- How you plan on fixing it so that neither you nor your girlfriend will have to go through the pain again.
Start off with a simple, blunt “I’m sorry.“ Don’t hem or haw, or try to apologize without actually saying “sorry.” Your girlfriend probably wants to hear those exact words, so be prepared to say them up front.[2]
If she asks you to leave, tell her you want to apologize. Tell her you really want to fix the problem and get your relationship back on track. Don’t yell or talk over her; you may frighten or upset her and make things worse.[3]
- If she seems really upset and doesn’t want to handle your apology right now, leave. Ask her if you can give her a call in a couple days.
